As a writer, I often find myself discovering scraps of writing I have jotted down somewhere, or suddenly, a line will appear in my head that doesn’t fit anywhere or doesn’t feel good enough. Sometimes, I foolishly let it fly away because it wasn’t what I was looking for at that moment. I have pondered how we do this with so many things. We set expectations and order and refuse anything that breaks the pattern, even if the thing we are shooing away isn’t harmful but is healing. We become so strict within ourselves that we become the cause of our discomfort. We search for relief in one way and refuse to accept that anything other than that specific thing will help. There is a calming effect that comes with the familiar, but only because one thing helps us, it doesn’t mean something else won’t. Here is a little silly analogy. Only because you love fries doesn’t mean you can’t like mash. It doesn’t mean mash isn’t satisfying, even if fries are your favorite. The same goes for everything in life. Are you feeling sad? Then you probably know something that can help, but if you are being entirely honest, can you say you are open-minded and open-hearted to other options?
We tend to dismiss things before attempting them and convince ourselves that something else won’t work with so much stubbornness, it stands no chance. If you require evidence then remember cold engines on winter mornings require pep talks and a little belief. If all we can think of is doom then doom will pitch a tent and start building a home. I was against exercising for so long. Told myself that I hated it and did so with such intensity I couldn’t let myself feel how I genuinely felt. There was no benefit because I refused there to be one. I was determined for it to fail, so it failed; however, when I let go, gave it a chance, and approached it with openness, I learned it does a lot for my mental health. This is one example of many. We are also guilty of doing this with smaller things in our lives. Films that don’t fall into our preferred genres or songs outside of our usual sound. We build preexisting expectations and are too loyal to them at times.
This links with my writing because I was so stuck in my process that I ignored any beneficial forward. I had a preferred way of doing and to even attempt another way felt wrong so I convinced myself nothing else would be right. My biggest growth as a writer was when I let go of the silly belief that I had it figured out and I allowed myself openly to attempt another person’s way. I have been doing this profession for a long while and I recently heard somebody suggest they were too good for beginner classes and too seasoned to attend workshops that focussed on the art of writing from a starting point but here is the real magic trick, being able to get something out any space you are in. Whether this is in regards to a new cadence, the way of titling poems or another person’s process even if it appears strange to you.
Sometimes you just have to put down your umbrella and feel the rain.
Learning and listening share a house. Sometimes we have to be quiet and take in what the world is offering. Sometimes we just have to ask questions to dig deeper. I know you might have a lot to give this world but this world also has a lot to give you. Just because somebody has only been doing a certain craft for a few months as opposed to your few years it doesn’t mean their perspectives matter less or that they don’t have anything of worth to give you. I am at the stage in my career where I am confident in saying that I am a good writer. I run workshops, coach and run classes, however, the moment somebody talks about their process or their way of constructing poems, I listen with the intent of being taught. Whether these are new writers, seasoned writers, retired writers, whoever they are and whatever stage they are in, I exist in that place as a student. I recently read a ‘How To Slam’ book despite having slam wins under my belt because there are a million angles to look at one thing and I want to consider all of them. If you believe you are the best you will ever be, I can promise you you’re wrong.
In regards to finding scraps of paper, I have started writing down the notes I would abandon before, and the results have been incredible. Instead of telling myself they are awful and brushing them out the door, I let them stay a while. I give them room in my notepad and let them ruminate because it is also about becoming a student of yourself. Who were you when you wrote something and how have your opinions changed? Do you have more to say? Who are you now? Give yourself the freedom to make mistakes and allow yourself to see the growth in things. Find the bravery to grow.
In summary, we can be terrible at giving things chances, and we should open ourselves to everything. It is okay if you give something a genuine attempt and it doesn’t work out for you, but please try it. Download the running app, try those HIIT workouts, make that recipe you’ve been unsure about, and write the poetry you are sure will suck. In celebration of this, here is an ending of a poem my brain created that doesn’t have a body yet. Hopefully, one day, it will.
“Please call back later
I’m trying to sleep off the silence
And if you don’t understand
what I’m saying
Congratulations
You’re cured.”
Did you like today’s newsletter? What are you looking to learn? Sound off in the comments.