The Noise Harbour
24th March 2021
Sound is weird. Truthfully, loud noises make my ASD brain go into overdrive and want to murder the sound. Like create a vessel for the sound to physically embody and do a proper murder of the thing. Full on, watch the light leave its eyes levels of dark. Then there are sounds that are equally loud and even louder that make me feel all the positive things. Elation, relaxation, less frustration, mental hydration, sadness takes a vacation, I regain my patience, my brain stops its conversations, I hop in my spaceship, and come back to earth. The sound of a waterfall is blissful but it's noisy beyond household noise yet the sound of dripping water can drive me crazy. Another thing that can push you to insanity is trying to figure out the logic behind illogical things. We are human beings which unfortunately means we have a lot of stuff about us that doesn't make sense sometimes. I am a man of understanding, of needing to know the causes and reason for all things. It took me a lot of practice to not ignore but allow some of my autistic traits to just be. I can't determine what noise will do what on what day. I can't understand why everything is good but my depression is running around the village starting fires. However, a lot of how I cope is here, in these newsletters every single day. Even when I'm not talking, I am simply letting my brain take the lead and I merely follow it. I threw in a random rap earlier and I have a knack for being the least serious person in a serious situation and still being helpful. All of this is just me letting my brain be. And I have come to know when it is leading me down dark places or obsessing over something I cannot answer or fix. A lot of these techniques came from meditation. And today, we are at the midweek and I just wanted to remind you that you aren't alone. You have a safe place here to talk if nowhere else and all you are feeling is entirely natural. This went on for a lot longer than anticipated but the 3x3 also links into medication and peace. I wrote this a while back. Never shared it. I was sat on a cliff edge and I was being my dumbsmart self and watching Sav just take in the sea aka taking in the sounds of the movement aka the ebb - whatever, ebbsorb is a thing and it's here baby. Be free today, let your mind wander but only in the places you deem safe.
Knees bent inward.
Spine standing tall.
Peace we ebbsorb.
GIF O Clock
Nothing can really explain how I feel better than a cat stuck in a vase so here's a cat, in a vase.
Song of the day that isn't a song
Today I'm throwing a spanner into the works and sharing a podcast episode instead. I know , I am unhinged! If you haven't heard this you should. It's a great podcast episode that you'll relate to and the resolution is shweeeeet.
If you ain't subscribed do it now and you can get all these juicy extras and so much more. Only $5. Not even like two bagels. Less than your cereal budget, probably.